Sunday, April 22, 2012

F-a-r-e-n-e-r-a-l-s (farenerals) (yes, it's english)

Farewells are weird. The end. That's all there is to it. They are just strange. Here we go, to church, to ONE meeting (the most vital, I'll give 'em that) to say goodbye to guys we either do not know hardly at all and are only there to see the people, we are there for the food (This is the only reason I go.....just kidding...but it is definitely a plus), or to sit there and wallow in your confusion as you say goodby to THREE boys on the same day because you are not sure you will ever see them again. The thing is, I'm one of those people who goes because I am their friend...or at least....was at some point or another. The three boys I have said goodbye to today have all had some large impact on my life at one point or another and have been an influence in the person I have become....or, rather, the person I am still becoming (lets face it, we never finish becoming who we want to become...constant progression. Yup. Never ends.....).  It's weird to think of life without them because they were such a big part of me at one point, and, in some ways, maybe they still are. But farewells and funerals are not that much different if you think about it. You go. Someone speaks. You feel the spirit (hopefully). You say goodbye to the person (or persons). You say hi to people. You usually talk to the parents or close friends or whatever. You eat food. You go home. AND you wear Sunday clothes. SO, in my opinion, they are not that much different. Still feels like a funeral to me. At least, today it does...I hate saying goodbye...It makes me sad. I don't cry until I have to say goodbye to someone. And then it's a waterfall. A very stupid waterfall. And then I feel stupid for looking like a clown because I wasted my make up this morning and now it's all over my face and BLAH! Anywho....
Some boys I once knew sang a song today at a farewell I went to and it reminded me of my favorite hymn, Lead Kindly, Light. My sisters and I sang it a long time ago when we all lived in our family ward here in good ol' AF. It is definitely the song that fills my soul today and has for quite some time.

Song of the day: Lead Kindly Light

Love Always, Cass

P.S. Here are the lyrics if you would like to look at them...

Lead, kindly Light, amid th’encircling gloom, lead Thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home; lead Thou me on!
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.

I was not ever thus, nor prayed that Thou shouldst lead me on;
I loved to choose and see my path; but now lead Thou me on!
I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears,
Pride ruled my will. Remember not past years!

So long Thy power hath blest me, sure it still will lead me on.
O’er moor and fen, o’er crag and torrent, till the night is gone,
And with the morn those angel faces smile, which I
Have loved long since, and lost awhile!

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