Monday, April 18, 2011

Major Decision

Today, I've decided to major in dance. Some of those who may have read this or heard me talking before have probably known this before me. I couldn't decide between dance or photography. I decided that I was going to double major. Double majoring while being on the drill team, keeping my scholarship, and keeping a 'b' average to remain on the team, take institute, etc, etc, would have killed me.
I think I am superwoman or whatever sometimes and that I can do anything and nothing can take me down or ruin my dreams. But, of course, I am a human, and there are things I may not be able to do. I know this for a fact. Dance and photography mixed up in schedules for registering for classes. They were all offered at the same time. I love photography, but dance has always been my 'thing.' Photo didn't pop up until my sophomore year.
I was teaching at auditions today for Dance Co. at my high school. It dawned on me how much I really enjoy teaching dance. I hate (almost more than anything) getting up in front of people. But, that's funny because I love speaking in public and I love teaching dance. I'm a performer. I don't know how it works, but who cares, it's who I am.
I was standing by the fridge talking to my mom and (on the sides of religion), I had been pacing back and forth last night after looking at my schedule for next year. (I think I'm going to die, by the way.) I couldn't figure out what I needed to do.....what I wanted to do. Photo or dance, dance or photo, photo or dance...
So, after auditions today, I walked in the house, leaned on the fridge, and started talking to my mom about it and how much fun I had helping people and showing them how to do things. I said, "I really enjoy teaching dance, mom." and then I paused, smiled at her and said, "And I think I just figured it out."
I am sad that I am not pursuing photo at this point in my life. But I think I can MAKE TIME for it to be at LEAST a hobby or something like that.
I guess sometimes (like I said before) the obvious isn't always completely obvious when it comes to making choices. At least that's how it is for me. Thank goodness for common sense.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Obviously Obvious


[ob-vee-uhs] –adjective

1. easily seen, recognized, or understood; open to view or knowledge; evident: an obvious advantage.
2. lacking in subtlety.
3. Obsolete . being or standing in the way.
I've been thinking a lot about how obvious things are. It's so funny how the obvious things seem to be the things we miss the most. (at least that's how it seems to be for me.) I never see the obviousness of things, or I do and I just ignore it because it's something I'm not in the mood to face.
The things that most people don't find obvious, I do. I just don't get it. It's so confusing to be to think that something is obvious to one person, but not to me.
There was this sign my niece and I saw on the way to St. George this past weekend. It said, "When you die, you will meet God." I pointed it out to her and said "No, duh!" We both laughed and then she said, "That's like saying, 'If you cut the cheese, you will eat it.'" I thought that was pretty hilarious.
 But, seriously. How many times do we go around cutting cheese off of Colby jack cheese blocks and not thinking about what we're going to do with it after. It's not about if you eat it or not (at least I don't think it is), it's about how you eat it and when.
It's obvious, no?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

1500 Words (Give Me A Break!)

So, I just put in my entry and I am only like, fourty or thirty or something words away from having fifteen hundred words. Speaking of fifteen hundred, I always get confused on whetehr or not a hyphen (spelling?) goes in the middle of those numbers or what. Because there are so many numbers and they are all spelled a relatively different way. I don't know if I am even making any sense. I hope no one is reading this. I really hope no one is. I'm pretty sure that's enough words. okay, this time is for real....i hope....

Unedited (not what you think, I swear)

I still need about five hundred more words. This is bad because I was almost falling asleep anyway while thinking of what else to write about. (which, I have no idea what I am going to write about p.s.) I haven't even taken my medicine yet and I'm already dying of sleep deprivation so much so that I am up late. I love how the one time ot this school year that I really get sick is during one of the busiest weeks of school for me. It's so dump! Arg!
I don't know how I can stay awake any longer. This is new for me because I usually have a hard time falling asleep. Although, falling asleep is not a concern, the staying asleep part is the part I generally worry about. But, what's the poing of worrying about that when I'll be on medication for that part tonight! Yay! I'll sleep like I never have before! Maybe....I guess we will just have to see how everything goes down.
Why am I even talking about this? I don't even really know what I'm saying because I 'm havelf asleep and everyone is in bed except me. I feel so alone. I don't reallly know what's going on because I'm just so discom bobulated right now thatut feeks kuje nt gead is tipping one way and my body is tipping the other. Maybe that's beause Iml'm falling asleep. I have my eyes closed right now even while :I am typing this. It's not my fault I don't have fifteen hundred words wo put in for the assignment on them that is due tomorrow, because I have had no time at all....holy crap I think I just had a dream that I was at the dinosaur museum. I even opened my eyes from typing and I had something in the dream that I was saying. That's funnny how our mind works that way, I think. I wonder how long this is. I hate how there is no word count on here. It drives me insane. Well, not really, but it would be super nice if there was a word count on here for insances such as this so I could know if I need to quite typing or not. I guess I'll just cut and paste and if it's not enough, I'll have another completelyu poingless entry like this one. And by the way, I'm not editing this one because i don't want to have to, and I think it's sort of funny to see how tired I am in some spots. It some places ity really shows, So, I guess we will see.

10:30pm Wake-Up Call

As my lovely Dance Company friends and I were in my car driving back to the high school from getting our music cut at The Amazing David Banner's house, we all started to talk about how everyone is graduating (well not everyone but three girls (including me) will be, so, it's sad, and most of them will be seniors....anyway!) and stuff like that. When we got to the high school, we saw this person and what looked like another person laying down in the parking lot. We were all laughing, because a boy sat up, so we assumed what most high school kids would assume: make-out session was interrupted. So, we were giggling and whatnot, but when we drove past them, there was no "them" at all. It was only a "him." A "him" and a bunch of bags and things lying around him. He didn't look very happy and he was all by himself with all his stuff. He looked familiar, but none of us could put a name to the face, we've only just seen him around.
We all wanted to get out and help him or offer him a ride or something, but a bunch of girls with a strange boy at 10:30 at night was not a good idea. So, we decided to let life just take it's course.
This made me think of how we take so many things for granted in our lives. So much of the cliche' things that everyone says they're "grateful for", when we really should be and those are the first things that come to our heads because they're true. Things like a wonderful family, a bed, warmth, shelter, food, money, clothing, etc. There are so many "cliche's" out there, but they are only said so much because they are true. If they weren't true, not very many people at all would say them and they wouldn't be cliche' anymore. I have no idea where any of this is going because it's late, I still have homework to do, and my medication has worn off, but I can't take my night medication because it will make me sleepy. And I can't sleep when I have all this homework! AHHH!
So, here's a list of things I'm grateful for:
  • food
  • loving family
  • shelter
  • clothes
  • medication
  • bed
  • music
  • cars
  • heaters
  • soap
  • warm showers
  • good education
  • sleep......
  • my amazing friends
  • Tylenol
  • gas (in the car)
  • flowers
  • socks
  • dance
  • choices
  • entertainment
  • long breaks from school or other forceful activities
  • sunny days
  • rainy days
  • sweats
  • sweets
  • big lunches
  • toothbrushes
  • floss
  • carpet
  • books
  • and lots of other things, too.
I guess sometimes life just throws a wake-up call at you that says "Hey, chin up, life is good." This was one of those times.

6,000,527,972 Tissues Later

So, I'm not trying to feel sorry for myself or anything, I just have 1500 words due tomorrow and I currently have 0 consecutive words so far. So, I'm in a dilemma and I have a horrible COLD!!! C: crappy O: obvious
L: lung deficiency D: death.
It's only Wednesday and I've pretty much been having an out-of-body experience, literally. My body has been in one spot and my mind has been floating off in the distance around it. This is a problem considering that I have a test every freaking day this week and I have Dance company  (where spinning causes my body to split in half and odd sensations to creep up on me out of nowhere). Wednesday's almost over and tomorrow will be Thursday, then it's Friday . . . . . . Drum roll, please . . . . SPRING BREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!!!!!!!
I am so excited. Maybe, if God provides a miracle, I'll get caught up on my sleep (if I don't wake up at 3am and lay there for a few hours for once). Drug induced insomnia is impossible, meaning: an insomnia impossible to do anything about. I've had it since my sophomore year (except last night I took Tylenol and I slept all night like a baby. Which, I don't understand why we use that term because babies don't generally sleep very well.
BREAKING NEWS: There seems to be an anonymous disturbance coming from my book case. A mysterious cracking noise that my parents and I can not figure out. Only further investigation will tell. Back to you . . .
I don't know what I plan to do about this cold other than going to the doctor and preventing me from getting pneumonia. I've tried all the medications in the book all the other times and none of them seem to work, except praying, but my nose runs like a faucet and my throat itches like a mosquito bite. I feel like I'm in a tank top and hot shorts laying on the beach in Antarctica, freezing my cahoot off, except I'm in layer after layer after layer in my bed, under three blankets, with my teddy bear (and that's another story . . .), sniffing away, not knowing which way is up because, remember, my brain is across the room at the moment, pathetically coughing (literally, I have, like, princess coughs. I sound like freaking snow white coughing attractively to get attention from her prince (who doesn't exist at this moment so I don't know why I'd be coughing like that in the first place.)), breathing as much as I can. Oh, wait! It's not called breathing, it's called lack of oxygen. That's probably what's cutting off my brain signals. My lungs are calling out "Air! Please! Air for the poor! *cough* *sniff* *gasp* . . . . . *ACHOO!* O_O Maybe I'll survive to see another sunrise. Just maybe, but, if I don't, I just want to let you all know that Tweedy Bird slippers are surprisingly comfortable. EAT IT! Well, time to meet my friends, let's hope I don't kill them with the plague.