I have begun to doubt myself.
How silly is that?
I mean, I go about my life making decisions and feeling completely spectacular about them and then BAM it hits me.
I read in Creative Is A Verb today a little something about doubting...
"For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. but there was always some obstacle in the way. Something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life." - Alfred Souza
I read this and thought, HE'S RIGHT!
Smack in the face!
WAKE UP SLEEPY HEAD!
I go from day to day wondering how things will effect me in the long run, trying to make the right choices so nothing will get in my way eventually.
I didn't realize until today that focusing on the future and the effects of the long run all the time has been steering me away from the present.
I'm living farther than I can reach.
I think I think too much.
Sometimes I think I care too much.
I KNOW I trust too much.
And I really really eat WAY too much.
(In fact I just had french fries and ditched out on the gym...)
I've decided to live in the day.
What's the point in living 30% in the past
60% in the future
and 10% in the past?
The only one that patters is the NOW.
I guess I just found my focus.
Now I just have to find my eyes.